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It Gets To Be Easy
We empower women to grow confident in creating their most healthful & joy-filled life with ease.
It Gets To Be Easy
Ditching the Doctor's Script: Your Body, Your Rules
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Katie and Shauna dive into creating your own natural wellness path instead of relying on conditioned healthcare approaches that often fail to provide meaningful support, especially for women navigating hormonal transitions.
• Breaking free from expected behaviors around wellness and embracing our own intuitive approaches
• How conventional healthcare excels at emergency care but falls short on women's wellness support
• Katie's eye-opening midwife appointment and discovering the lack of research on perimenopause
• Reframing our relationship with our bodies from "fixing what's wrong" to "nourishing what's needed"
• Accepting the natural variability of women's cycles and hormones rather than fighting for control
• Using body awareness as a compassion tool for ourselves and others
• The importance of finding community with others experiencing similar transitions
• Reclaiming ancient feminine wisdom that has been dismissed as taboo
• Using social media intentionally to connect with supportive communities
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Shauna Bell @sbell.wellness
Katie Smith @k.smithoilsfitness
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Welcome to it Gets To Be Easy Podcast where you're granted permission to live your most healthful and joy-filled life with ease.
Speaker 1:We are your hosts, katie and Shauna, and together we've been cracking the code to creating our own realities with ease, and now we've set out to help you grow confident in this too. Welcome back to the show. We hope that you've enjoyed the last couple of episodes of us tapping into some what some may call out of the box routines and rituals and curiosity tools that we've been exploring to help us get more connected with ourselves. So today we want to chat about this even more. We've both been noticing more in our own bodies and recognizing that we're being called more than ever to lean into creating our own path with life in general.
Speaker 1:But these particular things versus trying to access conditioned supports that have, you know, the expected behaviors of really just accepting like this, is the usual way to address our wellness needs, and for those of you who know us, we've talked about this before this is really something that Sean and I have leaned heavily into, even before we met. But really, you know, natural wellness brought us together and natural wellness is a way of thinking consciously about how we approach life and how we approach our well-being. So today we want to chat a little bit about breaking down that expected way of behavior and trying to what it means to really embrace driving your own path. So, and just so the listeners know, shauna's getting over a little bit of a cold and some lost voice, so bear with us this episode, but we felt this was too important not to dive in today.
Speaker 2:Yes, Thank you. Thank you for telling them that I was going to sound different. So the good thing is I feel fine today. It's just the voice is a little weird, you guys. So hang with me as we share about these things.
Speaker 2:But, yeah, I think this is a great topic to just continue to expand where we've been for many years. Like you said before, we met each other and now together. You know when we started sharing natural wellness tools with the world. You know from our own experiences with essential oils and supplements and just stepping out of the box of how maybe things are set up in our world for us to get support.
Speaker 2:And you know, I want to honor the fact that I think our country is really great at surgical care and emergency care when it comes to our medical community and maybe even sick care in some ways, but not so much the wellness part, you guys, and that's the part that I think we're being asked to step out of it even more from some of the things we're trying to get information on as our female bodies go through different phases and changes in life and trying to navigate that and still maybe reaching out for some of those supports and then really being disappointed in the fact that they really aren't giving us what we need or want, and it's like, why are we even still reaching for that?
Speaker 2:And so I think this is a really great candid conversation for us to have today, to just go there and to talk about it, and for those of you listening to know that you're not alone and to talk about it, and for those of you listening to know that you're not alone if you're also like I went to the doctor and it doesn't make any sense what they're telling me or not telling me, right? And so we just want to just chat about that and kind of see where this goes and maybe just give us all permission to continue to step out of that box and create our own path, if that's actually what it takes to be able to do this and to access our life in the way that we want to.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely, and not to hide the ball, but effectively. Sean and I are both women in our 40s and more and more we're learning that there's this transitional phase from being like in your high reproductive years all the way to menopause. And so for the men listeners, this is how you can support the women in your life by paying attention. But one of the most fascinating things is, you know, if you think about, like, how we phrase women empowerment and in a lot of people, people you know have certain beliefs around what it means to empower women body over, you know, choice over your body and things like that. But I have been really trying to figure out what does this transitional phase look like? Like, what are the expected things that are? Like you know, what are the things that are happening to my body and what are the expected outcomes, or you know range of things that, too, I might experience. So I went in with eyes wide open. I made a midwife appointment. My sister is a midwife and she just she's very, she's a little more Western medicine than myself, but she believes in a woman's body and its natural abilities to take care of us. Despite that, she's like make an appointment and see what you can learn. And so, to summarize my experience is I went in and I knew, going in, that I had to tell them that I wasn't here for birth control.
Speaker 1:I am a 40-year-old woman. I know when I ovulate I do not need to prevent pregnancy with synthetic hormones, but I know that it's more than that. They are using that as a tool for women to basically, like, shut down what's naturally happening to their bodies. And she's like, in this phase of life, like your hormones are going to be all over the place. She's like so you know a lot of that's the solution we offer people. Instead, I said well, that's not really a solution, is it? It's just a bandaid. So how do we change this narrative? And she was very honest with me. And she's like we have not done enough research to help support women in this phase. She's like they're doing more and more and they're getting there.
Speaker 1:She's like but at this point, she's like you are one of the most prepared people that I've had come in my office. She's like you are above and beyond. And she's like at this stage, good luck, like that was. She's like keep, you know, what you figure out is what you're going to figure out, but she's like you can expect things to be a roller coaster and that's just not okay with me, because I just believe that there are ways that we can support ourselves that can diminish the roller coaster effects but also accept what's naturally happening in our bodies.
Speaker 1:But also accept what's naturally happening in our bodies, like women's body is a magnificent thing and what it is capable of doing, from growing life to giving life, to supporting us and these creativity phases like all four phases of our cycle We've talked about these.
Speaker 1:That's incredible what a woman's body goes through every month. It's insane and I think that the more that we can learn, like she said, then the better off we can support ourselves. But in the meantime, just like we said at the beginning of this episode, it's like we are being called to not just accept these uncomfortable truths of we don't know enough, but to really lean into finding out what works for our bodies and what works for us as women and I and I this can go across the spectrum of just taking care of our health, but also in life, like understanding that we are going to take risks that other people aren't going to take, or we're going to push what other people aren't going to push and accepting that and detaching from the conditions that we. You know we have to please everybody. We have to do what makes other people comfortable.
Speaker 2:Oh, my goodness, friend, did you just pack us in with so much? Goodness in that? Because you know that's the thing. Goodness in that, because you know that's the thing. Like you go to someone right that you know and trust that they have some information or they learn some things, or they've even had experience right of working with all these women, and so we're hopeful that there's going to be some patterns that maybe we can tap into and get that information, and and then it's like, like you said, you had to go in there, though also armed, knowing what the the kind of blanket answer would be right, that it's just going to be this pill that you already know is a hard no for you.
Speaker 2:And you know I've experienced that in my life too. And you know, did I use that tool before I knew better? Yeah, I did for a long time and, without going into a guilt trip on that, do I believe that that pill is actually what impacted a lot of what is happening in my life even now. Yeah, so we're going to, you know, step off the train of like dang I wish I didn't do that and just embrace the fact that we know better now and we get to make choices and we get to share that information and just empower even younger people to know that there are ways to know your body that are not taught in traditional ways or traditional schooling or conversations, whatever that don't require, um, something synthetic that is having such a lasting impact. Um, you know, and so, yeah, being able to what you said, just like diminish some of these things that are putting us on a rollercoaster, and I think that one of the things that um is still such a work in progress for me, but have seen a lot of, just being able to embrace it myself, is honoring the fact that it's not always going to be the same.
Speaker 2:You know, like you said, our female body is so incredibly magnificent and there's so many components to it, and just knowing that we can't show up every single day, at every single part of our cycle, trying to be going after it or doing all of the things, and if our body is asking us for, you know, certain rest or certain periods of you know, tapping into our intuition to the level of like, what is it that you need? You know what supplements do you need, what food do you need. You know what activity do you need. What level of creativity are you asking for, like all of these things that we do get to tap into.
Speaker 2:But I think one of the things that's helping me is like we have to step out of this ego piece of it that something is wrong, because I think that that's the part that we're still chasing, or we're still looking for someone to give me an answer or a fix, or, hey, try this, this is going to work, or this is going to support you in this is because we are still a little bit leaned into that condition of something happened, something's wrong. I need a solution to fix, versus if we change that and flip that script a little bit to like what are you asking me to nourish you with right Versus fixing, and I think that that's the part that I don't have all the answers to that by any means. This is like in action right now, in life, right, but I just think that that's such an important part of this conversation is for us to just continue to get really curious about what it is our body's asking and seeing if we can step out of that frustration that we get with it, because, let's be honest, it's frustrating.
Speaker 1:It is, and I think that's the biggest thing for me you hit it, you just hit it. It's like releasing that ego of like okay, what's wrong, fix it. Because I definitely went into that appointment being like not necessarily can I fix this, but more like how do I get my arms around it and control it? And that's basically what it was. I walked out of there realizing like that the expectation is to expect the variables expect it to not be the same week over week, month over month, and just honor that. And by releasing that expectation of control or releasing that expectation of consistency, it will release the stress on my body, which will subsequently probably help consistency. But the ego piece of feeling like how do you accept change and that's really what I feel like this is is how do we accept that the flow will be different for lack of a better phrase but like our life will be different and that, and helping the people around us see that.
Speaker 1:I think that was the biggest thing. We've been having some really deep adult conversations in our household lately and Carl looked at me. He goes where are you at in your cycle? And I was like oh yeah, I'm luteal. He's like maybe we should save this till next week. Then I was like, look at you, look at you, I love you. That was great and you're probably right. Yes, and so it was.
Speaker 1:And for those of you who are like, what does she mean? It's like, well, when you start your cycle and you start bleeding, like you have such low hormone levels, so it's the best time to make like deep decisions, like to think deeply. You won't be skewed, you won't. You know it won't be this rainbows and highlights of the follicular ambulatory phase or storm clouds from luteal phase. You're clear and and I think that's what's going to take us through this. Next, you know, 10 years, is understanding that giving ourselves the grace, like you said, or really expecting the unexpected kind of kind of cuts the ties, cuts the rope on the usual people, of being like I can't accept the unexpected, like that's ridiculous, like it should be every 28 days and do all these things and no, it's. You do what you can to take care of yourself and you let your body take care of you, and that's by apparently doing a fire cell on all your eggs through your 40s. So that's how I'm describing it.
Speaker 2:That's so funny, but I think it's. You know, this conversation has a lot of value, because I think one of the things that I know that I get from it and to be brave and to talk about them and to be like I don't know about this part Let me, like you know, do some research on that, or let me explore that. Or let me even just ask my higher self, like can you give me something here? That? Or let me even just ask my higher self like can you give me something here? You know, I think, the more that we do that it's really crucial because, like you just said, that was so cool. You know that your husband was able to tap into that and be like hey, I've noticed this.
Speaker 2:That's kind of how we all need to get in spaces where we're really, you know, creating things together, we're working on things together.
Speaker 2:You know, being able to detach from expectations, like you said earlier, is, like, so really incredibly important. And to be in spaces where people understand that that's what's going on and not that you're just like not available or that you don't't care, or you know, and and it does take some of that pressure off of you too, of like you can't perform at your top level all of the time, and it's just something that conditioned workspaces, conditioned home environments, conditioned social settings all of it has just become something where we really look like things are supposed to look a certain way all of the time, and so I think that you know I talked about in the last episode how getting curious about astrology was like a compassion tool. This is the same thing. It's like learning about this and really understanding it for ourselves and then being able to see it in each other and recognize and honor that in each other is a compassion tool that's absolutely necessary in order for us to be able to function together.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's incredible. I think that there's not, you know, as, as a mom of an almost 10 year old I little girl, I think that that's something that I I'm so as much as I'm like you know she's going to have this for the next 40 years, but at the same time, I'm like I am excited for her. I'm excited, I'm excited for me to be able to, like, help the next generation feel empowered by their cycle not that it is this massive burden and help her understand things. And I do the same with our son too. We talk about it all the time. So it's, you know, redirecting our energy, and by you know.
Speaker 1:We listened to, we shared the Smell Robbins podcast and she's talking about these five things you know to do to keep furthering your life, and the things that stuck out to me was the read of harnessing the power of your brain to redirect your energy in a positive way. Your brain to redirect your energy in a positive way. And that's what I feel like we're trying to say here is like the norm is going to be, like, oh, this is just the way it is, and like you have to live in misery. But if you flip that and you're like this is the way it is. So I'm going to accept that and I'm going to say, like my body is doing this incredible thing for me and it's going to take me to the next phase of life. And is it going to be perfect? Probably not, but I accept that too.
Speaker 1:And so, going into that and really trying to be like okay, I can spin this positively and it's not. You know what's the phrase. It's like I don't even remember. Basically, we're trying to be too positive all the time, but it's realistic and that's like the gratitude practice. Anytime I'm feeling frustrated about my body or my body image, I instantly now go to being like this body gave me three children. Like. This body can lift heavy weights. This body takes me on walks every day, like, and I'm thankful. So I think that's really. That piece is where we can start to say we're leaning into a different way of accepting things, and not in this begrudgingly, but in this like wholehearted, positive way of accepting things.
Speaker 2:I love that. Yeah, it's definitely. That gratitude piece is really something that we're all being called to tap into in so many parts of our lives right now. I really truly feel that, just across our planet, all things, and something that was coming through, as you were saying, that is just reflecting back to something we've said a couple episodes ago just really being able to step into that gratitude and realize that these things are happening for us versus to us. And so you know, I think many, many episodes ago, you know, we talked about how we're, you know, with women, empowerment and women going into the workforce and all of those kind of things.
Speaker 2:I think that things went in a direction that maybe that was not intended Right, and so then topics such as cycles became taboo and it became things you don't talk about. Or you just show up at a doctor and they say you're just a woman, deal with it. Or you know it's like you know, even terms like that are used to describe it like shark week and all of these things that are like horrible things that we're dealing with Right. And so I just love that you talked about, you know, your kids and how you know you're being able to help that next generation to kind of unwind that.
Speaker 2:And I think that you know that's something that I've been getting curious about too, and just tapping into there's ancient wisdom in the feminine, like deep, sacred stuff, you guys, that literally got abandoned and became taboo and like things that we're not supposed to do or talk about because of just trying to step into this patriarchal world, and so I think we're being called back to look at those things from a place of empowerment, and so that excites me, and I think a lot of that has to do with us even recognizing that there is this desire and this ability within us to have more harmony between our feminine and our masculine, and it's not one way or the other, and that there gets to be more of this fluid dance between that. Should we be seeking it out and being able to just have these conversations like we are here today? It's really key for us as we evolve into this.
Speaker 1:That's so good. I love that and I think one of the, like you said at the beginning, one of the takeaways we hope for our listeners and sorry for a second, I think I said readers last week in our our episode that went live today. I was like our readers.
Speaker 2:I was laughing because I know how much of a reader you are and I was like, oh she's. She's actually talking to her readers. You know her book club folks.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but our listeners is to like help you feel not alone, and so some of the things that I've really found helpful lately is to start to follow.
Speaker 1:You know, if you're going to have social media, it's like following people who are talking about perimenopause or menopause. They're talking about what you're going through. So, whatever phase our listeners are in, it's like find people that you who make you feel good, like don't have the people who make you feel bad about whatever it is. But I which has been helpful because I'm listening and seeing that like okay, these things that I'm experiencing are what other people are experiencing and I'm not going to call them like the normal, but it's the range of things that you can expect, and that's what I want people to hear is like there is a range. You don't have to accept one way or the other. That you're, you know, broken or you're in the normal path. That you're, you know broken or you're in the normal path, but that other women are experiencing this too and we're talking about it and we're just trying to support each other, because accepting that this is what's happening to our bodies is the first step and having community is the second.
Speaker 2:So yes, that was so such a good um, a good way to put that, because we do need to be seeking out those pieces. I think sometimes social media can become something that is so just us looking at people's highlight reels and it just doesn't even feel like you can connect sometimes. Just get rid of that, you guys. Just get rid of that, because the more that you are in these spaces, the more I connect with people on there and connect with things that are meaningful to me and make sense to me. It's actually a cool place to hang out. It does actually feel like community and it doesn't feel like all of the chaos and the noise and the yuckiness of the world, and so I think it really does have value and I just love that you brought that up today, because it is a really good way this day and age for us to connect outside of ourselves, but do it with purpose and meaning behind it, because otherwise you do feel alone. Still, if you're not in those spaces that are more connected to what it is that you're feeling and you have it going on for you, and then you get so much empowerment from that because you're like, oh my gosh, you too, and you can have those conversations and really connect in. So that's awesome, all right, does this seem like a good place for us to wrap today? Awesome, as always. Listeners, we really thank you for being here with us. We trust that something within our conversation today has sparked your own curiosity, or it's just felt relatable, and that it encourages you to follow your own breadcrumbs. It helps you to build your confidence in stepping outside of the box and leaning into your own path.
Speaker 2:Before we hop off, we do want to, of course, invite you over to our Patreon community, where we do have an awesome library of support tools.
Speaker 2:You guys, we recently gathered those up in kind of a more supportive way, and so we want you to come check that out. We really think that it's going to help you be able to integrate some of the things we have conversations about and be able to expand on them and to be able to follow them for you personally. And then, sis, please, if something in today's conversation made you think of someone else, send her this episode and don't forget to personalize it. So don't just send it to her and don't forget to personalize it. So don't just send it to her. Let her know why you're sending it to her what made you think of her in this, so that she's going to want to tap into it too. Um, and so we just thank you so much for listening in and, of course, we're going to catch you here next time. We love you so much. We want to welcome you, to tune in, stay close and grow with us. Come feel empowered, inspired and connected.
Speaker 1:Check the show notes to follow us. And, of course, we'd love for you to take us on social media and you share wetlands for you until next time, breathe on purpose, stay curious and trust your intuition.