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It Gets To Be Easy
We empower women to grow confident in creating their most healthful & joy-filled life with ease.
It Gets To Be Easy
Unlocking Growth Through Authenticity
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What if the key to living a joyful life lies in embracing discomfort and shedding our metaphorical masks? In this episode of "It Gets To Be Easy," Katie and Shauna tackle the theme of authenticity and self-awareness, inviting listeners to question the societal pressures and ego-driven narratives that lead us to hide behind facades. Discover how acknowledging the protective role of the ego and confronting discomfort can unlock personal growth and joy. Through revisiting past episodes, we inspire you to challenge these narratives and uncover what you might be hiding—and why. Together, let's empower ourselves to create realities grounded in authenticity and ease.
Join us as we explore the transformative power of emotional exploration and connection in both personal and professional realms. We delve into the impact of social bonds and humor in our work lives, revealing how supportive colleagues can lighten our emotional burdens. By fostering emotional vulnerability, we transform it into a tool for personal evolution. This episode underscores the importance of embracing the full spectrum of emotions to lead a more genuine and intentional life. Engaging with our community, we encourage you to share your journey, insights, and continue this empowering conversation with us. Your presence is valued, and we look forward to growing and connecting together, one authentic step at a time.
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Welcome to it Gets To Be Easy Podcast where you're granted permission to live your most healthful and joy-filled life with ease.
Speaker 3:We are your hosts, katie and Shauna, and together we've been cracking the code to creating our own realities with ease, and now we've set out to help you grow confident in this too.
Speaker 2:Hey friends, welcome back to the show. We really hope that you have been enjoying our format lately. You know, we've really just kind of switched things up. We've been sharing some throwback episodes, just allowing us to revisit and dive deeper into some of, honestly, our most prized conversations that we've had so far, and I know as we've personally dropped back into these episodes and then just allow them to take us to this next level within us and then, of course, coming and sharing with you all over on social media. We really have noticed that there's some deep, up-leveled coding going on here, like we're really downloading some stuff.
Speaker 2:That is, it's exciting to to really get these conversations going. So you know, we really want to stay conscious of creating our own realities. I mean, that's so much the premise of what we're talking about here and we want to see it and feel it with more and more ease and really empower you to be able to do this too. So you know, of course we're trying to keep the joy factor meter at the forefront too, and, you know, through this we really truly do feel like we're continuing to strengthen our own awareness around that impact of hustle on our lives and as we shift this into more like an evolved way of living as multi-passionate women. It is something that really is staying at the forefront, and so I'm excited for this conversation to unfold today with us and really just expand on what we started riffing on on a previous episode last month, and so, if you recall, we were kind of chatting about masks and like how we end up putting these on based on, like, what we should be doing or, you know, outside influences or societal pressures, you know co-expectations, all the ego stories that are happening in our mind based on experiences we've already had, and trying to keep us safe, all of that.
Speaker 2:And so, as I mentioned in that episode, I think we do have to be mindful that, as humans, we do want to relate to others. Of course we want to be seen, but it really feels like and I feel like this is coming through in other conversations, other people too it really feels like we're being called to look at this and to see if some of this masking, this really taking on these societal expectations, is masking it at the expense of us really being our authentic selves. So, katie, I want you to jump in here. I know that I was looking at your notes as we were preparing for this, and you went into that too, like how these ego stories kind of can get really loud. And I think that's a really great place to start, because we were just throwing back to our episode of less ego, more soul right before this, so let's jump in there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, thank you. So I did go back and listen to our episode two Less Ego, more Soul and we shared that this week as we're recording. So if you're listening now, head back and listen to that too. It's a great companion episode.
Speaker 1:But one of the things that I was pulling out from that along this conversation of masking, was that, you know, considering these questions like what are we masking and why?
Speaker 1:And what really started kept coming up for me was that ego really is that protector. We talk a lot about that in the past and it's going to try and protect you and it'll keep you in that familiar hell, and that's that. Whatever it is, whether it's actually keeping you from addressing things that are bothering you, keeping you from feeling, truly feeling your, your all your feels for lack of a better word but it's going to keep you in this space, so you don't address things. But when you address these things, though, that brings you into your greatest growth, and so we have to address that. Ego plays this role of protector, but sometimes, like, we need to feel the discomfort, we need to feel the resistance in order to truly grow and understand, like, what is it that we want to pursue for our most joyful life and you said that, like, creating our own realities is a key focus here, and allowing ourselves to get uncomfortable is going to be a big part of that growth.
Speaker 2:Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2:Yes, that's such a big deal, and you know, the more that I allow myself to go here, personally, I realized that, like I realized a lot of the masks that I've put on, of maybe not wanting to disappoint others I think I talked about that in the previous episode that we did too is that I'm realizing it really had nothing to do with them.
Speaker 2:It had to do with me not wanting to be uncomfortable with how they might feel, and so I think that this is something that we are kind of looking through it in a different lens and allowing ourselves to go there, and I think maybe this is like up-leveling how we respond to ego too, because it's letting us acknowledge that ego has the stories right. So it's not necessarily that we're trying to push past them, but acknowledging them in a way and showing ego that we actually don't need that protection in this evolution that we're going with here, and so then it's helping us kind of pull out of that need for safety. I mean, that's really what ego is about is trying to make us feel like we need to be safe. But the more we go to that and look at that uncomfortable hell, uncomfortable hell, as you mentioned it's like that's encouraging us, that's encouraging our nourishing ego and just allowing us to see that these masks, you know, they don't have to be about safety.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and just to like take it back a second. You know, when we're talking about masks and I think you just picked it up Well, I was like it's really something we're doing to protect ourselves. So, for example, as an achiever, we have a brand new puppy and we have a dog trainer who's coming to our house to help us train this dog. And the mask of perfectionist to protect myself from being critiqued or told that I could be doing something better. I'm like, no, I will achieve, I will be a hundred percent.
Speaker 1:And I could feel myself putting that on in this instance, where I was like I can't do something wrong, like I'm not, I am a superhuman, I'm not allowed to do that. But when in reality, it was like no, I don't, I don't have to show up that way, I'm still a worthy human, I'm still a good dog mom, if I make mistakes or if I don't do it perfectly the first time. And so that's what we're talking about with these masks that they're there to protect us, because ego is like you don't want to feel less than, but really, this is an opportunity for me to grow and say I don't, I'm not going to get it right, and that's okay and move on from that, Like no one's going to judge me because I can't get it perfect. I'm not a dog trainer, so I trained, paid someone else to do this for me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly. Oh, my goodness, I love that you went there with that, because that was such a very specific example. But I can see that too. I can see that, as you know, this has been a time at my job, outside of the house, that we've been doing employee evaluations and you know just, it is something where we're not only talking about the things that we really exceed at, but it's really important for us to look at the areas that we want to improve with. Right, if we're all working on this common goal, we all have these things within us that we want to improve on.
Speaker 2:And, yeah, like you just said, like I think this ego protecting mask of like, oh no, I have to be exactly, you know, like a hundred percent of who and what I, you know, am expected to be. And so when we hear things that there's areas for room improvement, it feels sticky and yucky and that we don't want to go there, we don't want to think about it, we don't other, you know, part of it, I think, comes through. Or we hear ego tells us stories that we don't want to disappoint someone else, right, even if someone else is more of a specialist in that area, whatever it is, you know. So, yeah, I think that's a really good point is that it is something and I think one of the codes we're talking about here that's coming through is we're being called to be honest about those things, just to really observe them and not to beat ourselves up about it, but just to say, like we're all humans, like this is all okay for us to have these areas to improve or even to lean on someone else who is the specialist, like I don't even have to become the expert at that, because you know someone else gets to work in their strengths for this and then, of course, spiral in and support us with it.
Speaker 2:So that's really cool that you know you're seeing that, simultaneous to example, that I was feeling and journaling about a little bit here too. But yeah, I think it all goes back to that safety piece and you know, when I was thinking and journaling about it for this, I was saying like we fall into those, like we got to do X, y, z, and it's not just because you know we think we have these to do's, but it's also like to fit in, to be accepted, to get what someone else is experiencing, that we're seeing them experience or we think we're just seeing their highlight reel sometimes in the world of social media Right, and just feeling like we have to put on a mask or do it the way that they're doing it in order for us to experience that, and so we kind of get really mixed up in this story of it not being safe to be who we really are.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh. Yes, and I think, too, it's like when you're in that scenario of deciding whether or not you put the mask on or you act like your authentic self, but we have this choice of behaving how we feel like we're supposed to and I think that's what we're addressing here is that when you, in our original episodes, you kept bringing up like we need to surrender or letting it, and that's because it's like it's how we allow our emotional state, and one of the things that's so powerful and we've talked about this in manifestation episodes or just in general is like our emotional state is something that we can control for lack of a better word but that emotional state is what shapes and forms our reality. We're calling in people who are being authentic as well. We are calling in good experiences, but we're also calling in the resistance that's going to help us to grow. But if we don't allow ourselves to feel, we aren't going to take advantage of that growth opportunity, and these masks are those things that are going to going to kind of keep us from doing that, and that's that's what we're trying to talk about here is like it can feel like this foreign thing, and in that episode I my other experience was like allowing myself to have fun and and you know, inner child is the big thing right now.
Speaker 1:It's like having fun. I'm so programmed to be responsible and having fun is something that I would weigh heavily with guilt because I'm like, am I supposed to have fun? And once I kind of went through that. It was fun to hear that because a year ago, the resistance that I was feeling about going and doing things that were fun for me, and I look back at this last year and I'm like, oh wow, like I did, I did have a lot of fun. This year, I said yes to a lot more fun and I feel like a better version of myself because I did that and I watched my partner step in and support me in that, because he could see that as well, and I think I love that's what you said at the beginning of this like I hope everyone's enjoying our flashbacks, but I know deeply like that's it's so important to go back less into an episode and see the growth that we've had.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh my gosh, there's so much there and I see some mirror things for me there too.
Speaker 2:I was realizing, you know, I think you and I were having some conversations last week offline about how, you know, I was just kind of feeling very heavy with some work stuff.
Speaker 2:And then this week, like I still am as packed with the things I'm doing, but I feel different.
Speaker 2:So I did some reflection on that, like what's different, and I'm like, okay, well, several of the people that I work with were not there last week, and so I realized, like that, how much like, even though there's a lot going on, there's a lot of laughter when we're together, there's a lot of connecting, there's a lot of shared to-dos all of those kind of things that are just so a part of who I authentically am, with wanting to connect with others, and humor is a big part of what I just naturally love to have in my day. And so I was like, oh my gosh, that's it. And that's exactly what you were just saying, like, yeah, of course, big fun going and allowing ourselves to do things outside of work. But then also for me it was just like, wow, what a really good way to observe what it is that made the difference between that and then realizing like, okay, now I get to be more conscious of that and of course I mean everybody gets to go and have their time away.
Speaker 2:So what am I going to do about that? And so then that's going to allow me to see how much I may need to be a little more intentional with, you know, making sure I'm getting those things to feel and to create my reality, you know to to get the things that we desire. So, yeah, that's really cool that you went there with that fun piece, and I think you also. It's so funny that I was looking in notes and I think I told you last week I had this note that I wrote down fear of emotional exposure, and I was like, but I didn't like keep going with it. What you just said was like, oh, that's what it was, so that's it right.
Speaker 2:We have this again ego protection, fear of letting ourselves go there with observing our emotions and our feelings, and what is it and even if it's things in the past or different parts of our timeline, I was thinking about that for today too is that it's been very powerful for me to allow myself to go back to things this year. I think that somewhere along the way I had a coping mechanism of just not doing that, not allowing that, and so going there this year has been very powerful, but something that's really even been more up-leveled more recently is when I go there and when I observe the story that happened in my past or a memory pops up Like okay, let myself go there. But then also, as I'm observing what's there, not necessarily getting stuck on like the story or what happened, those kinds of things, but allowing myself to go to the vibration of it. So what was it that maybe felt uncomfortable at that time, maybe was not a good feeling what we would label as a good emotion they're really not good and bad emotions but I think we go there as people, as humans. I don't want to feel like that and so allowing myself to go to the vibration of that and just not even getting tangled in what actually happened.
Speaker 2:But what's the underlying feeling? What's the emotion? What's the vibration? Everything is energetics, right. And then going to what's the desire to up-level that? What is it that I need to integrate so that I can now use this as a tool to evolve how I'm approaching these type of things? So that's been really powerful and something I wanted to share with you all today, and I think it's a practice. It definitely. I mean, this has been going on for quite some time for me, but I just want to continue to keep talking about that because I think it's a very powerful tool for us when we're looking at masks. Like we've got to get honest, we've got to allow ourselves to go there and to kind of figure out what it is that we want to kind of gather up from maybe something that's happened before.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think that sitting in that discomfort, or what is seemed perceived as discomfort in the time and we talked about or thinking through this, is like sometimes. That that's what comes to mind for me when I'm thinking through these things of like. Are we allowing our heart, emotions to, like you said, to see what it is that we can take away from or integrate into our lives so that we can continue to grow and evolve? And I know, and I feel like everyone has this, but ego is going to continue to try and push away those bad discomfort. And that can mean you're like, you know you're. If you're feeling that, you're like oof, I want to run away from that. It's almost like a signal to yourself to lean into it a little bit more. And I know, yeah, I think of that often. I relate it to my kids and I try and get out of their big feelings because I'm like, oh, that makes me uncomfortable, but what am I teaching them? I'm not teaching them how to deal with it. And but even more for myself is being comfortable with other people's discomfort is another part of that. And and I think that comes with reflecting back where does that come from?
Speaker 1:For me, it was always trying to emotionally scan the room with with the adults in my life when I was a kid and I was always trying to make sure, fixing it so people weren't angry or upset. Whereas it's full spectrum Now, it's like to back to the fun example. I didn't even know how to be stuck in that joyful feeling either, and so I think that as I continue to work through this and we talk about it and we feel it it's we have to allow ourselves to feel the full range, from happy to sad, angry, disappointed, but then also allow other people to feel that. And yeah, I've said this before, when it comes to crying, like I never try and make my kids stop crying At least I don't often but I let them cry it out and then we talk about it.
Speaker 1:I don't say, oh, it's going to be. I don't try and push them away from that feeling. And we have to do that with ourselves too, as the adults, Because then you can see how you can show up as a better person. You're like, oh wow, I'm not carrying that in my neck, I'm not carrying that in my hip, Like even physically speaking, I know that like my physical discomfort has gotten less and less over the last two years, and that's that. I know that that's fully attributed to resting, to acknowledging, to accepting and just allowing myself to be my authentic human.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh, my goodness, that you know caring for your human. Yeah, oh, my goodness, that you know caring for your human. I was just someone sent me something. This guy was a guest on the Drew Barrymore show and it was just a little clip from it and he was talking about how, like, ask ourselves this question, like what would I do today to take care of my human? And he went on to say, like, like loving yourself isn't actually a feeling, like it's an approach, it's a job and so like that's what we're saying here is just like really actually getting into that is, it is what sounds like work per se, because you know, we have to get in there and allow it to happen.
Speaker 2:And something you just said, too, was are we allowing our heart and so an ego gets involved, like we're really heady, and so it's like we're really going off of using our brilliant minds to figure it out, to fix it, to run from it, whatever it is that we decide to do with it.
Speaker 2:But, yeah, that's been one of those big strategies or tools that I'm using with masks and allowing myself to go there and observe and see if I'm really being authentically me is. I'm trying to notice if I'm just being too heady, you know, and it's not that I need to leave the head space, it's that I'm feeling like, okay, there needs to be more coherence here. And I was having a conversation with someone about this and I was realizing that, dang one of the masks I put on, like you were just saying as a kid, like emotionally scanning rooms and figuring out what you needed to fix and make sure everybody's okay, and all the things like, oh, I actually forgot about the heart space. It became really heavy, right, and so, yeah, I think it's a really good tool for us to monitor and to allow ourselves to make sure there is this coherence between heart and head. And so then we are becoming more magnets for what it is that we want, because we're not just like constantly questioning whether we're doing it, doing it right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I know both of us felt this and we have notes on this too but like how hustle culture feeds into driving us to lead with our heads solving, constantly doing, and I think that that's in hustle cultures where ego is really going to thrive, because it's not allowing us to step into true consciousness, and which is what our souls crave. And so, if we're able to step into our feeling, you have to allow the time to process those things, and so that's where you're like, in order to truly do this, you have to pull back from the hustle. You're able to decide, like what is it that I truly desire, and do I want more or less of whatever it is? And that's when your authentic self can truly step in. And I feel like it goes back to her saying we are the creator of our emotional state of being and so we are truly the creator of our joy-filled life. But you have to allow the feelings to truly create your life, and I think that I'm not clearly not perfect at this.
Speaker 1:We have so much hustle in our lives, but I also know that I'm very intentional about making it fit into what's happening in our lives, even if it comes down to just like me doing my daily walk, like that's me not hustling, and I and you guys, it's three, day three of having this puppy, day four of having this puppy in our house, and I have only got on my daily walk once and I feel it. I feel the tension. I don't feel like I've gotten my release and I was like this go, go, go just is happening and I'm like no, no, no, I need to pull back and find time for this. So then now you have the resistance. This is the contrast. I don't want that, because I like this yeah.
Speaker 2:Wow, yeah, it's powerful to go there, and I think that's the thing with hustle is that we just have to constantly kind of look through it. Are we efforting through things? Or, yes, we're multi-passionate, we got all these things going in our lives, we're engaged a lot, but we're still realizing that we can maintain this grounded feeling, however it is, that we're getting it, like you were saying, that walk piece of it right For me. I'm noticing, like, even if I'm just, you know, carrying some crystals in my pocket that I know I'm connecting to, I've got these oils in my pocket, I'm pulling them out and using them. Take a pause to breathe for a little bit.
Speaker 2:I even realized this week that after working with someone that kind of felt heavy, I was like brushing myself off and I was like, oh yeah, like wow, I can't believe how powerful that was. You know, like you said, we physically hold onto things and the more we can just realize what it is that keeps us grounded while we're still, you know, really engaged in things. That it's different. It's really different than hustle, because we're taking care of ourselves while we're highly engaged, versus we're doing all the things. I hope that you all can see kind of how that looks different.
Speaker 2:And then, too, like I think some tools is mirroring, like notice what you're noticing in other people. You start judging it, ask yourself if there's something in you that is wanting you to pay attention, right, like I've noticed that for me with things it's like okay and it sounds a little funny, but sometimes I just pretend like I play all the parts right. So if that starts to come up and I start to question it more, I'm like huh. So if that's a version of me over there, like what's going on, you know, and I think it's very helpful to use that as an awareness tool to pull yourself into observing your own self without judgment.
Speaker 1:I like that. Oh, that's good. So I feel like, are we ready to really wrap this up? This is such a good bite size. We've left you with some really good stuff. So what do you think Like?
Speaker 1:We hope you can relate to this conversation today and really start to see the connections of allowing and that you know good and bad are meant for our highest good, and so we're curious if you're feeling that tug to allow for this more authentic, this more authentic authenticity.
Speaker 1:Excuse me, but also feeling like there's a lot of baggage or stories wrapped into how sometimes it doesn't feel easy to do this with all of these outside influences around us. We totally get that, and that's why we've come here and we are having these discussions and providing you with these opportunities to not feel alone in this journey. So we want to make sure you know about our exclusive Patreon community, where you can find lots of tools to help you drop in and deeper reflect on these topics we share, so that you, too, can feel like you are really sticking to taking responsibility for your own emotions, your vibrations, even allowing your stories and experiences to shift along the way. You get to create your own reality with more ease. Yes, it does require you to allow yourself to observe the uncomfortable, and that's just part of the journey, but all of it is so worth it. So we believe in you and we really look forward to hanging out with you next time. We just thank you so much for being here.
Speaker 2:We want to welcome you, to tune in, stay close and grow with us. Come feel empowered inspired and connected.
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Speaker 2:Until next time, breathe on purpose, stay curious and trust your intuition.